Yesterday, I hit my idea to visit nature with David in his holidays suddenly.
I booked every thing to please David and I drove a car for the first time in the U.S.A.
The car is left handle and car lane is right in the U.S.A. and it is different from Japanese driving.
I got a international driving licence in Japan, but I hesitated to drive in the U.S.A. a little.
But today, I could drive a car in the U.S.A. for the first time.
I was very exciting and my heart was pumping a lot with my hands sweat!!!
A few times, I mistook to move wipers instead of winkers...it was the opsite side of a steering wheel.
About 2 hours my first driving, I asked David to change the driving.
I felt exhausted and my palms & arms felt a little pain due to so much tension for driving.
But I felt a little confident to drive in the U.S.A. and I realized I need to practice it more...
My international driving licence is only 1 year term of the expiration.
So I have to pass the Washington state's driving licence next year to keep drive a car.
But I want to try learning it and pass the licence exam of driving with David's support.
For my first driving was lots of fun for me and David seemed to feel relaxed on the assistant seet without driving.
And we really enjoyed having time together with wonderful nature & beautiful sea in Port Angels.
David started to work in May.
And his working situation is very challenge for him and it is very competitive with other workers.
He is very new man and he seems to feel lots of pressure & stress every day.
And even his sleeping at night, his mind seems to think his work.
Sometimes he woke up ealy morning aroun a.m 3:00 and he can't sleep well due to think about working too much.
I feel his efforts to do his best every day and I belive his talent & ability to do well little by little.
And yesterday he got a nice deal again and it's the sum of money of his deal with customers.
The result of sales are compared with other workers and his result became nice raniking.
He told me, "I can't belive why I got to my deal today."
But I know his efforts every day and I saw his struggling for doing well in last 2 months.
After I heard his report of new deal, my tears went out from my eyes.
I was moved his efforts and I am really happy for his great efforts.
And I am so proud of his efforts and he deserves to accept this achievement.
I feel sometimes helpless & useless by myself compared with his efforts but he told me, " This achievement wouldn't happen without Keiko's love. Thank you so much."
It was unbelievable his words for me but he seems to think so actually.
My tears at this time is happy tears , so I don't want him to worry about me so much again.
Just I feel so much appreciation for his continuous efforts with lot of stress & pressure every single day.
As much as possible, I want to release his stress at home by my love for him hopefully...
Yesterday, someone knocked my door stronger than David's knocking in the early afternoon.
The time is too much early for David's come home, but sometimes he could come home early in the afternoo to surprise me.
So I thought that maybe David came back home and I opened the door without doubt.
But there was a big man with phone whoc I never seen before.
He looked at my face and our room number and he seemed to mistake to another room.
And as soon as he noticed his misunderstanding, he left soon.
I told about this happening later to David , he warned me not to open the door for strangers, NEVER!
"Here is the U.S.A. Not in Japan. Maybe strangers have a gun or bad guy may be outside."
I don't think about bad situation and dangerous happenings at all.
Around here, many neighborhoods are very friendly and kind to us and I felt as safe as houses.
And I have no worries and doubts about neighborhoos and outside around here but David warned me to be more careful.
Yesterday, nothing happened to me but there has never guarantee to happen safe always.
And we don't have any expencive valuables which someone want to steel here.
But I learned a lot from this happening.
I was a careless than David thinks.
So I try to be more careful than before...
But I want to believe that the most Americans are good people and harmless.
To have doubt for the others and worry about the danger so much are not positive thinking at all.
Just I want to try to be careful as David says and to think positive as much as possible to live in the U.S.A.
How was your New Moom yesterday??
David & I wrote our new moon prayers and we let them go for the new moon.
I am sure that our prayers will happen actually later or sooner...
How about your prayer??
I hope everyone can smile and feel happy today, too...
Today is new moon in June.
In the early morning, sky was cloudy and it was raining sometimes a little.
But in the afternoon, skyp became clear and sunshine came out.
After a little rain, the air outside became clearer than before and it felt so fresh.
The clear sky looks like my mind after crying a lot.
My mind became clearer than before and I can't feel any clouds in my mind.
Some kind friends gave me very sweet message and they made me so happy.
To cry sometimes needs to make my mind clear , I feel.
Tears has a energy to purify myself so my tears could work for it.
But some people worrried about me and I really really appreciate with their love for me.
Thank you so much for my precious people , now I am completely O.K.!!!
Well, the temparture became higher a little in the afternoon.
So I made a tofu icecream.
It is very easy and simple to make.
I boiled & drained water off tofu and add sweet drink made from fermented rice and carob powder (=bean's powder instead of cacao) , soy milk ,sinnamon powder & a little peanuts butter to them and just mix together.
And after that , just freeze it.
The balance of sweetness is up to you.
After freezing foods, the sweetness of them feels less than before , so just a little bit you had better to adjust make it sweeter than normal.
David told me chocolate taste of icecream the best.
So I made for him to please him after his working.
Normal icecream in the shop are extremly sweet usually.
Sugar doesn't need our body and it can be toxin in our body if you take it too much in a day.
But the sweetness from rice is very natural sweetness and it is not harmful for our body.
Tender & mild sweetness can our body & mind relaxed and comfortable.
So I want David to eat it tonight's dessert.
If you can get an organic tofu, please try to make a soy icecream.
I recommend it for everyone if you have some time to make it...
I wish you can enjoy your New Moon day today for your happy life.
This new moon is good for pray about LOVE.
Last night, I cried a lot somehow.
After coming back to Seattle, about las 1 month and half, and my heart are holding lots of emotions inside, I guess.
I can't express my heart with any words but lots of tears came out and flew over.
David told me "your tears hit me, I don't want you to cry anymore." , and his eyes are filled with lots of tears.
I tried to stop crying because I don't want him to cry like me.
He hugged me tight & strong and I became settle down little by little.
After I cried enough in David's arms, my mind became clearer than before.
In this early morning, David sent a message to his workplace to take a holiday for me.
He worries about me so much and he decided to take a holiday to be with me.
I think "I am O.K." but he doesn't think so.
I am very greatful for his love that my heart is completely relieved with him today.
Just to be together and talk each other are very precious time to recover my mind normally.
Thank you for David again and again, I am very thankful for him...
His love can melt my stiff heart naturally.
When David & I went to Samui island in Thailand for our honeymoon, I ate a lot of watermelon.
When I was child, I don't like watermelon so much.
It was tasteless for me and I don't understand the deliciousness.
But I grew up an adult, the simple sweetness of watermelon attracts me little by little.
And in Thailand , it was very hot every day and watermelon was useful to make my body cool down.
Especially, I like to eat the watermelon which was frozen in the freezer like a sorbe.
David bought me an oraganic watermelon which was cut one fourth last week.
A whole watermelon was too big to eat for us and I selected the small cut of it.
David told me to buy a whole one but I told him not to buy at that time.
But David knows how I really like watermelon.
And I enjoy eating the cut of watermelon with David.
But David bought me another organic whole watermelon again to surprise & please me.
It was 15lb (=about 6.8kg) and it was huge for me.
His love express to buy it for me , and I just accepted it.
Of course, I cut it small pieces and I freezed it in the freezer as usual.
It became cold and solid sorbe and it was really sweet as David love is.
I always feel David's love for me and it makes me so happy.
In return, I want to love him more naturally.
David and I are really nice conbination, we realized recentely again.
I don't know why we can love each other so deeply but our love is real.
So I want to be greatful for everything of DAVID and I am always thankfrul for our lucky meeting in Samui Isalnd last year.
We talked sometimes that we know each other for long years.
And our love is growing up day by day , I believe...
I wish my friends & family are filled with love always.
It is impossible to change others.
Only you can change yourself, I believe...
And others' actions, words and behaviors are not all of your fault.
They want to do anything as they are and their behavior is not your responsibility at all. NEVER!!
So you don't need to feel guilty or negative thought for others at all.
Sometimes people tend to feel that others think as you think.
But it is impossible, I think.
And only you can change your own way of thought & perception of others, so your change has a lot of possibilites to perceive this reality.
If you feel something wrong of other's behaviors, please don't judge them by your own thought.
You cannot judge them at all.
It's none of your business, I think.
But you can imagine about their feelings & emotions by your benevolence & compassion ,why & how they behaved like that.
If you discover other perceptions from different directions for them, you might feel them compassion & love without judgement.
There is just pure LOVE of yours for others.
Most people has own priority & worth in their each life and it is very different from yours.
It's common sense, isn't it??
So we can share the differences and influence each other with love & peace to grow up each in life.
This thought of mine is too much ideal??
You don't need feel any responsibility & guilty of others' behaviors, so you can feel more free, I believe.
So just be yourself as you are always, please.
And please remember , everyone are living own life as one's best every day.
I wish you can enjoy your own life without any negative thought for the others.
Weekends, David's work is always busy and always his holidays are weekdays.
And David hit somewhere to go today and we went outside together.
But he starts to think something and he stopped suddenly on the road.
He said, "where are we going??"
I laughed so much, "who knows??"
Only David knows his destination and I just followed his way.
Of course, he laughed at himself and we keep laughing together for a while.
And we started to walk without his thought somehow.
We got on the bus to downtown Seattle and we look around the Pike Place Market.
Today is Monday but many tourists are looking around this market.
We found a organic cherry and David bought it for us.
It was very fresh and tastey and I can't help eating it.
The price of organic cheey is 5 dollars as a half pound (about 225g).
I think it is a little expensive but this oragnic cherry is worth to pay 5 dollars.
David tried to buy another one for me because I really liked it, but I said to him, "No, thank you!"
He is always kind and gentle for me and I really appreciate his love for me.
Our outgoing to downtown Seattle today was so much fun and we enjoyed a lot.
His forgotten destination was not sure for it but anyway we had a nice time together.
To be together and to laugh so much made me happy as usual.
And we realized how perfect we are each other today, too...
Yesterday was the summer solstice.
In Seattle, every year many naked people run & ride a bicycle for the celebration.
I don't understand why they want to be naked for celebration.
I asked David whether he became to be naked in public before.
He has never been naked in his life, and I am happy to know that.
Don't people who can become naked in public feel ashamed at all??
Why they can be naked in public without shameful??
Maybe they want to be looked at their bodies or to show many people.
Anyway, I can't understand why at all.
And the level of the shame to be naked is very different from society & culture in different countries.
David seems to feel more conservative than Westerner.
Maybe he is closer to Japanese more than American, I feel sometimes.
So I am relieved to know that his thought about the shame to be naked is rememble mine.
How do you think of being naked in the public??
For celebration, can you be naked???
David took me to the beach to watch the sea.
And he introduced his friend's house just looking.
But suddenly his friend came out of her house to call and we could see her unexpectedly.
Last year, he introduced her for me for the first time.
And they are nice friend for many years.
She inviited her house and showed her nice rooms.
And her pretty 2 dogs are very cute and they really friendly to us.
Her house stands beside of the ocean and the view is very wonderful.
And she grows some flowers besides her house and I found my favorite flower.
She was so kind that she cut the flower to give me.
She tried to cut for me 3 of them but it too much for me.
So I was given 1 flower by her and I appreciate with her kindness.
We had a nice time for a while and I am very glad to see her by our sudden visit.
And David & she has a long & nice friendship for long years and I am very happy to know that.
I put on her flower in flower base after I came home as soon as possible.
And the flower is very beautiful like her.
David's friends are very kind & friendly to me, and I am very lucky to meet them through David.
I am so grateful for all of his friends' love always.
I think that David's nice character will connect with such great friends somehow...
Author:Masuda Keiko (増田佳子)
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