A few days ago, I heard of David's screaming during his sleeping when I stared to sleep at night.
Sometimes David had a night mere and he started to screaming before.
So I tried David to wake up to escape from his night mere and he was very sweat so much.
And after he woke up, he was in the middle of scary dream.
I didn't know what kind of dream he was in but he could feel O.K. to start sleeping again after we hugged each other tightly.
He is worried something in his life often and thinks a lot and sometimes he dreamed something to scary at night.
I tried not to worried anything in my life so much, so I seldom dream night mere these days.
And I believe that our life is getting better and better and everything is on GOD's hand, so I have no worries about my life for now and future.
I hope that David will not be worried something too much in his life anymore.
Because his mind is up to his way of thinking, so we practice to meditate to our mind in peace like emptiness for a while every day.
I wish our meditation time will David bring peaceful night without worries and night mere anymore to sleep deeply enough as much as possible.^^
From last week, I felt a pain around my pelvic bone and it influenced my way of walking.
After I kept sitting on a hard chair, my pelvic bone became so much pain when I started to walk somehow.
Last night, we had a plan to listen a concert of Japanese pianist in downtown Seattle and David looked forward to it from last week.
But yesterday, my pelvic bone and left leg were terribly hurt and David suggested me to change the plan.
To sitting a chair on the concert let me feel much pain, David thought.
I wanted to go the concert with Davis so much but my pain was not allowed to do it.
I was so sorry for David that my bad pain of body made him not going the concert, anyway...
But he was so kind for me that he cared for my body and my pain and he didn't say any complains about it at all.
I was so thankful for his kindness to care of my body and pain that I wanted to treat him better in return.
Anyway, today I could feel much better about my pelvic bone and left foot than yesterday.
So I hope that I will recover day by day to enjoy walking with David again...
But I am not sure of the cause of this pain...
I wonder what happened to my pelvic bone last month but I had no idea about this cause of pain at all....><
I want to believe my body's natural recovery day by day.^^
After Super Full moon day, it is raining today again.
In Seattle, rainy days are normal in every winter season.
But I like to walk outside without rain, so I check the sky and clouds before going outside.
I hope that I can walk outside today without rain.
From today, February has just started.
And the end of this month, David will welcome his birthday.
But he does not want to get old at all, but he looks very younger than his real age.
When I met him for the first time in Thailand, I thought that David was similar age as mine.
He is actually 14 years older than me, and I cannot believe how young he looks.
And I bought his birthday present already but he wants to wait getting it until his birthday.
So I hid it somewhere at home and I am very looking forward to seeing his reaction when he get it.
Anyway, even rainy day, David and I will enjoy today with love and smile.
Rain is Blessing from our MOTHER EARTH and I have no complains about weather.
To complain about weather is non sense, so I want to cherish each day with peaceful mind...^^
Today David and I went to hike at Boeing Creek Park together for the first time.
This park is close to our home but we have never been there to walk inside.
Today was beautiful day with sunshine & blue sky and it is "EASTER" holiday.
But I am not familiar with this holiday at all so just we wanted to enjoy hiking together.
This park has so great wild forest and a big park that we could enjoy hiking and watching some wild animals.
In a lake inside of this park, some wild ducks were swimming as a couple.
We could watch them closer along side of lake and they were so lovely.
Also during hiking in a wild forest, we could watch a wild chipmunk fortunately.
Usually we can watch wild squirrels around our home but this chipmunk was a tiny size and moved so quickly that I couldn't take a picture.
But we could watch it and lovely birds are singing in a forest.
Some part of course for hiking was little dangerous but it was fun for us not to fall down on the ground.
Also this trail has a nice small river along the hiking course and we could enjoy a lot to hike together, anyway.
We are sure of visiting this wonderful park again to hike at different course.
Today is Easter and most shops are closed but we could get a nice energy of nature & wild animals in Boeing Creek Par.
So we could relax together all day long today without holiday moods as a wonderful holiday.^^
What is LOVE?? And what is healing??
I don't know how to heal someone who has serious desperate situation exactly.
For example, to lose parent or to face on serious disease for many years are very difficult to handle by own energy & power sometime.
So I want to support someone who really need my love and support anyway.
But sometimes I feel myself helpless and enough to support someone because because they live on their own way of thinking in this real world.
So when I face on the desperate situation, I just focus on myself hot to feel inside deeply with compassion & benevolence.
Someone says, "God doesn't give any difficulties not to solve by own power." but sometimes we can feel the difficulty of solution.
My friend lost DAD in JAPAN these days and my precious students who I taught them some subjects when I was university student lost their MOM the end of last year.
And they lost precious parent suddenly and it hurt their hurt truly and terribly.
They must be in grief still now even some days passed after their parents' death.
How I can support and heal them??
It seems impossible to heal someone's heart completely because time is medicine, I believe.
And I want to believe one's strength of heart to recover their loss of parents by own power day by day.
So only what I can do for them is praying for their peace of heart with benevolence. I think.
And to support someone maybe my EGO and everyone can heal own heart with strength & toughness of self, I want to believe.
So just I want to watch and protect them with peace & love as much as possible until their true smile come back again.
Healing is not easy but everyone has a GREAT power to heal self and others, I believe.
How are you today??
I wish that you can smile today wish peace & love in your heart as much as possible even you lost someone who love in this world.^^
Today I went to cook for my special friend who has a serious disease for the 3rd time.
My cooking is based on Macrobiotics but I don't want to persistent on the theory too much.
Because the theory of Macrobiotic is not perfect for everyone's diet, I leaned a lot.
And I learned another healthy diet of cooking, based on Naturopathy, Ayruveda and raw foods etc.
So I want to arrange & adjust her body's condition & favorite foods as much as possible to let her enjoy my healing meals.
Because to eat something must be fun and pleasure time for everyone.
If we stick on only 1 way of diet, it will be so much stress & frustration because of less choice without fun.
To eat meals can let anyone feel happy, so I just tried to cook my best for her today.
And of course, I want her to recover her disease by my cooking so I am thinking a lot of idea for her.
Only 2 times a week, I started to cook for her at her home but every day I am thinking about her cooking with my pleasure.
She is very honest & frank lady and he gives me pure opinion about her opinion about my cooking meals and requests.
This is my huge challenge as a personal chef for her but I am so thankful for her that her disease gave me such a honor opportunity to cook by myself.
Yesterday, David was holiday so he supported my cooking so much.
I wanted him to take a rest for a while yesterday but he wanted to help me somehow.
I could feel so much love of him and I appreciate with his support.
David & I really love her and her husband because they are doing so great together to face on this situation with LOVE!!
We just want to support them with benevolence & positive hope as much as possible.
To support someone is not easy for me but I can feel so much energy to cook for her.
Not only cooking for her but also being a precious friend of her is important for me.
"To seize TODAY" is so hard for her that I respect her strength of mind and their love so much.
So I want to cook as much as I can for her because my energy of LOVE will put on my meals invisible vibration, I believe.
To heal her disease is up to GOD's hand and it is beyond our thinking but I am doing my best, because I really want to!!
David & I just keep doing our best to support her and healing energy will grow her up inside of her body & mind day by day...I pray!!^^
This world is made by GOD's LOVE, (my word of GOD means nothing typical religion at all.
The GOD means for me "this world CREATIVITY" and the existence of beyond our thinking and our existence.
And sometimes with Sunshine, I can feel the LOVE of GOD and it is so warm that my heart can become happy with gratitude.
I don't own anything before I was born in this world.
And I cannot own anything after I pass away someday.
So I believe that I came to this world fortunately as a human being to travel my SPIRIT by using my present body.
And GOD knows everything about me and around world and it is beyond my thinking.
Ｉ think that this visible world is just only a part of invisible world of this huge universe.
So just I want to believe the inner noble silence in my heart with peace.
Because only my heart with my eyes closed can feel the invisible world somehow.
And I believe the invisible energy to heal this world with peace & benevolence.
I guess that GOD love for us to love each other more and better without EGO.
How are you today??
Do you feel peace inside of your heart today??
I wish your TODAY will be wonderful with peace & LOVE as much as possible!^^
Today it is raining from this morning.
Winter in Seattle is mostly like this weather so I am not so feel bad at all.
So today David & I started our day with daily routine and we went to go shopping together.
We had a nice time to share each other and just we had a nice communication as usual.
But in this rain, we don't feel to go walking today.
So just we did own things each other to enjoy this rainy day on David's holiday.
Sometimes rain can let David feel down but I don't mind weather at all.
Because weather is always nothing as it is and just I don't want feel bad feeling about it.
I want to find something good inside of myself even rain or snow in this winter.
At any situation, we can enjoy each other with love & communication together!
How is your day today and how do you feel now??
I wish you will have a great day at any situation in this world...^^
Smorking is not good habit for all in this world.
I wish that the habit of smorking can dissapear in the future.
I feel the universe doesn't hope the unhealty habit for human beings,never!
How do you think of it?
I am happy to be able to laugh at something every day.
For me laughing power gives me a nice energy naturally.
Thank you for everything aournd me at this situation and all...
Author:Masuda Keiko (増田佳子)
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